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Guest EFT Authors

Home ► Articles ► Guest EFT Articles ► Teaching Kids to Tap

Teaching Kids to Tap

by Ann Adams

Gary Craig's Introduction:

Ann Adams is the Campus Director at a residential care facility for Severely Emotionally Disturbed children and, as such, has a challenging audience within which to deliver EFT. We can all learn from the story she provides below--even if we are applying EFT to adults. There are many lessons in both rapport and the "art of delivery" in this message. Please study it carefully.

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About 4 o'clock, I walked onto the admissions unit. The kids were lining up to go swimming. The newest child, "Kinney," asked who I was. Then, "What does she do?" [The new kids always want to learn the role of each staff member. They quickly learn and understand the chain of command.] I told him that one of the things I did was to teach kids how they can calm down quickly when they don't want to be upset.

Kinney is tall for 13. He has light brown hair and a pair of sad eyes that competed for the saddest I've ever seen. He expressed immediate interest: "Can you teach me?"

"Sure."

"Harvey," a slender, African American nine year old in perpetual motion, was in line behind him: I want to know too.

"OK."

"Ryan," 11, one of those absolutely adorable blond headed, blue-eyed children with impeccable manners - very RARE for our agency - spoke next. "Ma'm, if you wouldn't mind, I'd like to learn about that too." "No problem," I said, "I'll teach all three of you after supper."

When I returned to the unit the three boys immediately came up to me. "Teach me now," said Ryan. We sat down on the couches and I told them that what we were going to learn was something that calmed people down very quickly most of the time--that it sometimes worked better when you worked with someone else but that it was something they could use for themselves, by themselves.

I said this really makes use of things we already do to make ourselves feel better but using this process we can focus what we do and make it work much better. Showing them as I went, I then asked if they had done any of the following: Palm to head, hand to chest, head in hands, rubbing under eye and under nose, wringing hands, chewing on fingers, rubbing back of hand. They all nodded. Harvey, Mr. Perpetual Motion, started showing everyone how he bites his nails!

GC COMMENT: This is a superb verbal bridge to help these kids make sense of these procedures.

ANN CONTINUES: I told them this is a way to use all those motions together while thinking about what they were upset about. And that most of the time it made the upset feelings better and lots of times the bad feelings were just gone. I had their attention - well, except Harvey - who had changed seats already five times. I decided to try the Cook's Hook Up exercise to see if it would quiet him. He could not even hold his hands together long enough to follow the instructions. He wandered off - ah well, another day.

I asked Ryan and Kinney if anything had happened to upset them today. Neither could think of anything. This is often the case when I teach it to kids 'cold'. My primary goal is to familiarize them with the process. Many times, the next interaction I have with them is: "Hey Miss Ann, will you do the tapping stuff with me. I'm mad/upset/sad."

Harvey then wanders back and grabs at Ryan's arm. Ryan shoves him away angrily saying to me: "Yeah, I got a problem; peers that provoke me. I get frustrated." [We teach a whole new lexicon to young children: peers provoke, boundaries, negativity, levels, color drops, etc.]

Kinney also says he has a problem. "You don't have to tell me, but do you want to share it?" I said. Kinney then tells me a very sad story of a mom in jail for drugs and how worried he is about her and that she also has ulcer problems and that he misses her. [There are many, many such sad stories in our residential facility. Wish I could teach all the moms and dads how to tap!]

I explained how problems were like puzzles and that puzzles have a lot of pieces. That the first step was to think about your problem and then pick what piece of it you want to work on. Then, when that piece of the problem was fixed you would pick another piece until all the bad feelings were gone.

GC COMMENT: An excellent metaphor!! Creative approaches like this often spell the difference between cooperative and uncooperative children/clients.

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