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Brandon’s Story: Anger Problem Becomes History

By Ann Adams

Gary Craig's Introduction:

Ann Adams is the Campus Director at a residential care facility for Severely Emotionally Disturbed children and she shares with us this touching story of "Brandon." Copy this one. It is ideal to give to parents and teachers that must deal with "unruly children."

P.S. A thank you to Shari Snow whose work made this story possible.

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Sometimes our very best teachers are the children. The following story is certainly one of those ‘a little child shall lead them’ varieties. This seven-year-old not only proselytizes for tapping but has also written his own testimonial. My thanks go to Shari Snow who currently volunteers in a school setting in Lexington, NC, for sharing her work with 'Brandon'.

The first day Shari met Brandon she was told he was headed for a self contained class for students with emotional/behavioral problems. Brandon had experience difficulty since the day he entered school 2.5 years ago. He was considered "at-risk" before entering school.

During the current school year there had not been a day that he had not been sent to the principal’s office. This day he had just trashed his classroom and was working on trashing the principal’s office in anger. He continued to throw things as Shari talked to him about why he was so mad. When he realized she ‘got it’, and stopped a moment to breathe, Shari stretched out her hands and asked him to show how angry he was with his hands. He stretched them out as far as he could (indicating maximum anger). [Ann’s Note: Without good rapport you get nowhere. The child must see you as different from the other lecturing adults in his or her environment.]

Shari sat down on the floor in the office and said, “This looks really silly but just do what I am doing.” Brandon stopped the ‘tantrum’, sat down, and began to follow the tapping. She tapped with him one round before adding a set up statement for the second round: "Even though I am really mad and nobody will listen to me, I am still a really good kid who people should listen to."

Two rounds later, when asked how angry he was, Brandon put his hands together (indicating little or no anger). The school counselor watching this transformation could not believe it. She described it as "watching the anger melt away". Brandon and Shari talked some more about the issue that caused the outburst and then, together, they made a plan for the future. When it was time for Brandon to return to class, he asked, “Can I tap at home when I get mad too?” This child understood the power of this process in 5 minutes! He ‘got it’ quickly and made it a part of his life.

Shari writes: “Brandon is now a seven year old ambassador of energy therapies. He is tapping on his own and is showing classmates how to tap. He has people around him interested and looking for more information. He is teaching me lessons on how to ‘get the message’ across. He has opened doors I did not expect to open in the conservative rural community I live in. This little guy deserves ALL OF THE CREDIT. Me? I got lucky - what a wonderful teacher to learn from.”

Brandon has not been back to the principal’s office. Several weeks after the first tapping experience Brandon told Shari he was “ready to tell the story for my friends.” In the words of a seven year old, here is Brandon’s version of using energy therapies.

THE TAPPING STUFF

By Brandon (as told to Ms. S)

It makes the bad stuff not hurt as much.

They look at me funny. But now they know why I do it.

My friend got over his dog dying by tapping.

I showed him how to help his heart.

He told his mom to do it and she thought it was stupid.

I told him to do it anyways, just not let her see it.

He made his hands get smaller when Ms. S helped him

Ms. Lin (the counselor) reminds me to tap when I am mad.

I can tap in my classroom or ask to go see Ms. Lin.

I am teaching Ms. Lin how to tap.

She likes to tap by her nose. I like my forehead.

I like school now because I am good.

I got a treat from the principal for being good.

I never did that before.

My teachers did not like me because I was bad.

I think my teacher likes me now that I am good.

I think that is enough.

Oh yeah– I do the tapping at home when Nana yells at me.

Shari writes that “In six weeks time, this child can say – I like school now because I am good! His teacher insists that it is a miracle – I insist it is a very powerful message in the worth of all souls – regardless.”

Great work Shari! And hugs to all the Brandon's of the world.

Ann Adams

Important Update

Hi Everyone,

Ann Adams just sent me this update from Shari Snow on "Brandon," the anger laden child. This is a remarkable story that needs to be shared with school personnel; parents and anyone else dealing with emotionally disadvantaged children.

Hugs, Gary Craig

Ann -

The area students began their spring break on Thursday. I went to check on Brandon and found out he had been sent home early due to a discipline "issue". I was crushed until I heard the whole story.

It seems his teacher had been out all week and they had gone through 3 different substitutes. On Wednesday, the teacher assistant was also out, putting two subs in the classroom. Both subs knew the "old" Brandon and assumed the worst. Brandon was involved in a verbal confrontation with another student. When the "teacher/sub" intervened, Brandon asked to go see Ms. Lin (the counselor) so that he could "tap". The substitute did not understand and Brandon was "unable to explain himself because he was mad". The sub told him to go sit down and Brandon crawled under the teacher’s desk and began to tap - he refused to get out from under the desk until he was calm. The sub said she just left him "because it was easier than fighting with him".

When Brandon rejoined the class he was calm and did great until lunch when child he had the verbal disagreement with hit him in the lunch line. According to the sub, this had been going on all week - Brandon turned around and laid the kid out. He then walked to the office, sat down in a corner and began to tap. The secretary said he kept saying - "I am a good kid and other kids should treat me like one" - while he tapped.

Both boys’ parents were called. They could not find Brandon's guardian, but the other child's mother arrived full of steam. She apparently started to lay into Brandon - he stood up and very calmly told the parent that he was better than that and walked into the principal's office and sat down. The mother was headed off at the door.

When the counselor was told "Brandon was in the office", she ran expecting the worst. She said it was all she could do to keep the smile off her face as he calmly told her what had happened, that he was wrong, and that he knew that he was being sent home for hitting the other student. She said he rubbed his "sore spot" the entire time he was telling her about what had happened. He then looked at her and smiled saying - "but I remembered to tap."

Yes, a dip in the climb for perfection - but what a lesson to those of us that seem to be Brandon's "students".

Take care – Shari